One of the big draws of the latest “Twilight” movie is the wedding that kicks things off. Sorry to spoil things for anyone who isn’t caught up, but in “Breaking Dawn Part 1,” Bella (Kristen Stewart) and Edward (Robert Pattinson) tie the knot. In attendance at the backyard ceremony are vampires, werewolves and a few humans here and there, but it remains a relatively tame event. There is at least a bloody version of the wedding depicted in a dream sequence paying homage to Roger Vadim’s “Blood and Roses” (thanks to Glenn Kenny for noting the allusion), but otherwise I bet someone could go and witness the marriage of the Cullens without even realizing there are monsters about.
Other movie weddings of the fantasy, horror and sci-fi variety can go either way, with some being very obviously filled with non-human creatures and some being even more conspicuous, particularly to the person marrying the monster. Below are ten other monster weddings that you’d probaby not want to attend. Okay, you’d probably want to attend the Muppet wedding.
The Monster and The Monster’s Bride – “Bride of Frankenstein” (1935)
Another film referenced in “Breaking Dawn Part 1,” more directly so, is James Whale’s “Frankenstein” sequel (which many critics have acknowledged is also a reference to “Breaking Dawn” director Bill Condon’s film “Gods and Monsters”). While the Monster (Boris Karloff) and his newly created mate (Elsa Lanchester) don’t quite have a real legal marrital ritual, the soundtrack does feature wedding bells when she is unveiled to him and certainly it’s implied she’s his bride. Of course, the title doesn’t refer to the female monster, it refers to Elizabeth (Valerie Hobson), who marries Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive). Even if we consider only their union an actual wedding, there is still a monster involved, mostly as kidnapper of the bride, if not present at the nuptials.
Ursula (‘Vaness’) and Prince Eric – “The Little Mermaid” (1989)
One of many deceptive weddings, in Disney’s animated feature the tentacled sea witch Ursula disguises herself as the human woman ‘Vanessa’ in order to enchant Prince Eric and woo him away from Ariel. But with the help of her animal friends, the little mermaid is able to ruin the villain’s plot and eventually become the bride herself. By the end of the film, she has been turned into a human for good, though, so her and Eric’s wedding ceremony is not the creature kind.
Bill Farrell and Marge Bradley – “I Married a Monster from Outer Space” (1958)
Bad things always happen to guys who hold their bachelor party too close to their wedding. Bill (Tom Tryon) has his the night before, and on his way home he’s attacked by an alien who takes the groom’s form and his place. The next day this body snatcher shows up at the church and marries Marge (Gloria Talbott), who doesn’t realize until too late how odd her new husband is acting. Later they attend the wedding of some friends to whom the same thing has happened. All the men around are becoming possessed by an alien race who need human brides because all the females of their kind have been killed.
Celeste Martin and Steven Mills – “My Stepmother is an Alien” (1988)
Reverse the sexes of the previous pair and you’ve got this fish out of water comedy. But Celeste (Kim Basinger) is not impersonating any other woman — though she is in disguise — and her interstellar mission is not the same. She’s come to Earth to find out if Steven (Dan Akyroyd) or another scientist intentionally destroyed the gravity on her planet. So she marries him to get close enough to uncover the truth. In the process she falls in love with her human husband, but not before she’s nearly exposed by Steven’s teenage daughter (Alyson Hannigan).
Ming the Merciless and Dale Arden – “Flash Gordon” (1980)
In this pairing of an alien and human, the former is not disguised and the latter is not willing. And it’s not Earth. Dale (Melody Anderson) has traveled to the planet Mongo along with Flash Gordon (Sam J. Jones) and Dr. Zarkov (Chaim Topol) and immediately was enslaved as the bride to be of evil Emperor Ming (Max von Sydow). The greatest version of Wagner’s “The Wedding March” ensues, but the wedding is never completed thanks to Flash, savior of the universe. Ming’s marital plans are the same of many a film villain, including Emperor Tod (Jon Lovitz) of “Mom and Dad Save the World” and also earlier incarnations of the “Flash Gordon” story, but none of those others have a score by Queen.
Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog – “The Muppets Take Manhattan” (1984)
Is Kermit like Dale? Was he forced to marry Piggy in this deceptive stage number turned real deal? That’s not the issue now. And no, I don’t mean to say that either the pig or the frog are monsters. But this is a Muppet wedding, so of course there were a lot of monsters in attendance — especially, it seems, on the bride’s side, where most of the “Sesame Street” cast is sitting. This confuses me, by the way. Kermit was on “Sesame,” not Piggy. Shouldn’t those guys be on his side?
Betelguise and Lydia Deetz – “Beetlejuice” (1988)
More unwanted marriages, but at least this is another incomplete wedding, as “the Ghost with the Most,” Betelguise (Michael Keaton), tries to force Lydia (Winona Ryder) to be his bride so that he can return to the land of the living. But he’s stopped by fellow ghosts Barbara (Geena Davis) and Adam (Alec Baldwin) just in the nick of time. Tim Burton obviously enjoys monster marriages, because many years later he’d do another with “Corpse Bride,” in which a young man accidentally weds a dead girl who returns to the land of the living as a result.
Callista DeFord and Doug Shephard – “My Bloody Wedding” (2010)
Surely the cheapest, most awful film on the list (well, the cheapest, anyway, if we count the bonus), this doesn’t exclude it from fitting in. As a matter of fact, it’s probably the bloodiest, monster-iest movie on the list (well, bloodiest, because there seem to be a lot of Muppet monsters in the photo of Kermit and Piggy’s wedding up above). The plot has young bride Callista (Morgan Mead) becoming possessed by a demon just before her wedding. Then her bridesmaids become possessed, too, and the lot of them star eating other guests before her groom (Patrick Babbitt) and his friends (including a robot) stop her. Now I can’t wait to one day do a list of robot weddings, too.
Jesse and Jade – “Bride of Chucky” (1998)
A bit of a tribute to Whale’s “Frankenstein” sequel in plot as well as title, the fourth “Child’s Play” movie has Chucky the doll kill his human ex-girlfriend (Jennifer Tilly) and then transfer her soul into a girl doll, creating a mate more fit for his size and situation. Although they do become engaged, like Frankenstein”s Monsters they never technically are married. Fortunately for the sake of this list, the dolls are pretty much present at the wedding of their transporters/scapegoat couple, Jesse (Nick Stabile) and Jade (Katherine Heigl). Like “Breaking Dawn,” this film also ends with a thought-impossible birth.
Greta and Forster – “Gremlins 2: The New Batch” (1990)
In what I believe is a nod to the ending of “Some Like It Hot,” Joe Dante ends his brilliant “Gremlins” sequel with Forster the security guard (Dante regular Robert Picardo) succumbing to the advances of Greta, the female Gremlin. Earlier she full-on raped him, or so it’s implied. Then, just when you’ve forgotten about the poor guy, we learn that she did not die with the rest of the mutant monsters. Instead, she’s dressed up in a wedding gown and ready for marriage. Forster’s response is silent but he kind of resembles Jack Lemmon at the moment.
BONUS: Serafine Pigot and Andy McDermott – “An American Werewolf in Paris” (1997)
I wasn’t sure whether to include this film since it’s apparently up for debate whether or not Serafine (Julie Delpy) is still a werewolf in the end or not. I say she is, but I’m not up to watching the film to be sure. So I’m including it as a maybe-qualified runner-up, if only to include the clip of the most horribly ridiculous wedding ever in cinema. I think. In case you can’t tell what they’re doing in the pic above, they are bungee jumping from the Statue of Liberty torch. You can watch the whole stupid thing below – just fast forward a few minutes: