With “The Expendables 2” opening this weekend, its stars are using the opportunity to pimp their other forthcoming movies. Earlier today, Arnie got the lead out with a trailer for “The Last Stand” that, while totally rote, was at least identifiably a straight-faced action movie. Now, Sylvester Stallone drops “Bullet To The Head“… and we don’t know what to think.
The movie was originally slated to open in April, but was pushed back amidst rumors of editing room squabbles, and that Stallone himself was recutting the movie shot by Walter Hill. But man, whether he did or not, it looks like the footage he had to work with was dreadful to start. Looking just barely above a straight-to-DVD offering, “Bullet To The Head” seems to have grabbed a cast that can barely read the cue cards off camera, let alone command halfway decent acting skills, to tell the story of a New Orleans hitman (Sly) and a Gotham cop (Sung Kang), who team up to take down the men responsible for their partners’ murders. With the eye-rolling and moldy one liners, and plethora of age related jokes (“They don’t make records anymore.”) we can’t tell if this is a parody or not. It’s not supposed to this bad, is it? It says something when Christian Slater is doing the best job of anybody in this thing.
“Bullet To The Head” opens on February 1, 2013.