Recap: ‘Game Of Thrones’ Season 4, Episode 5 ‘First Of His Name’ Has Its Vengeance

Recap: ‘Game Of Thrones’ Season 4, Episode 5 'First Of His Name' Has Its Vengeance

Hi there. Still here, still writing about “Game of Thrones,” and will be for the rest of the season, so if you dislike my tone or the fact that I might complain about the specific portrayals of rape on screen, you might as well find another recapper to bother. Here’s the thing: I accept the fact that rape exists in Westeros, just as it exists in the world we live in (but, for the record, Westeros Time never existed. There are DRAGONS and SNOW ZOMBIES. It’s not real.) I accept rape as a part of a complicated, dark human nature that the show creators and GRRM choose to depict. My specific issue is with how the creators of this television show, who live in this world, in 2014, chose to represent it onscreen. I do not think it was necessary for storytelling or character purposes to have repeated graphic and violent depictions of rape, most particularly those in the scene in Craster’s Keep. If that makes me a Puritan, well then slap a bonnet on me and call me Goodie Walsh. I (and others!) also think the writers of the show really, really missed the mark with Jaime’s trajectory, and did not fit that particular rape into his storyline well at all. On a pure storytelling level, they really whiffed that one—it seems random, which an act like that definitely should not seem. My one question for you all is: is defending TV rape in the comments section really the fight you want to put your energy into? If so, that’s sad.

This week is a much more staid, exposition-y affair (well, staid by ‘GOT’ standards). There is some sweet vengeance on the part of some of our most victimized members, but for the most part, there’s a lot of setting the stage, elucidating and illuminating some past or unclear events, and inching things forward, with of course a couple of offed characters because this is “Game of Thrones” and that’s how they do (by the way, here’s a game to play with your ‘GOT’ watch party if you like to account for those sorts of things). 

King’s Landing
Sweetie boy and kitten lover Tommen, the First of His Name (Dean-Charles Chapman) is crowned King! Oh happy, somber day. While he makes googly eyes at his girlfriend/babysitter Margaery (Natalie Dormer), dragon Mom Cersei (Lena Headey) intercepts the two and makes a beeline for the temptress of her sons. As the two gaze on Tommen, they have a frank discussion about Joffrey, with Cersei acknowledging that Joffrey would have been Margaery’s nightmare, and that she herself was blinded by her mother’s love for him in spite of his shocking actions. It seems that Cersei has calmed down and accepted that she might as well delegate some of the Tommen-wrangling duties to Margaery, since Tommen doesn’t need that much wrangling anyway. Though Margaery plays coy, she basically accepts Cersei’s proposal to marry Tommen, and re-become queen. Also, Cersei has to marry Loras, which is going to make this whole situation so, so weird and incest-y (as Marg points out).

Cersei even negotiates the timing with Tywin (Charles Dance) to ensure it takes place after the appropriate mourning period (a fortnight). She’ll marry Loras a fortnight after that. Tywin then gives her a very boring and Dad-like lecture about fiscal responsibility and the Tyrells and the Iron Bank of Braavos. They are deep in the hole to the IBB, and although Cersei thinks they should just talk to someone “who works there,” (LOL) Tywin explains that the IBB is sort of like the IMF, and is an unmoving institution. WE GOT IT, DAD, DEBT IS BAD. Interestingly, Tywin also suggests that he is on the side of a fair trial for Tyrion (Peter Dinklage), whatever that may be. He’s not entirely Team Cersei it seems. 

Next on Cersei’s Friend-Making Tour, Oberyn Martell (Pedro Pascal)! They stroll the gardens and talk of their daughters (he has eight). Cersei is super cynical about the “power” or lack of she has in her life, especially when it comes to her kids. As Oberyn promises the safe-keeping of her daughter Myrcella, Cersei very tellingly states, “everywhere in the world they hurt little girls.” Sad, and true. As they look over the water, Cersei asks him to take Myrcella a present—a tall ship sitting in the harbor. Is this for Myrcella to make an escape? Start a revolt? Take an afternoon sail? It’s a poignant and humane moment for Cersei. 

Across the Narrow Sea
Daenerys Targaryen (Emilia Clarke) is holed up in a random tower with her coterie of men. At least she changed her dress! Jorah Mormont (Iain Glen) informs her of Joffrey’s death, while Daario Naharis (Michiel Huisman) informs her that he has taken the Meereenese navy of 93 ships just for kicks. While Dany is miffed he acted without her orders, she nevertheless contemplates a raid on King’s Landing with her army and newfound navy. You can tell she likes the idea of glory. However, Jorah informs her that Yunkai and Astapor are back to their enslaving, corrupting, power-hungry ways, and Khaleesi knows she will never be respected, and empowered, without ruling justly and firmly. Westeros will wait. 

Eyrie 
Littlefinger/Lord Baelish/Mayor Carcetti (Aiden Gillen) and Sansa Stark (Sophie Turner) make their way through an the oppressive and terrifying canyon to the Bloody Gate of Eyrie, guarded on all sides by archers at the ready. Once they pass through the Bloody Gate, things don’t get any less terrifying or oppressive, not with auntie Lysa Arryn (Kate Dickie) to welcome them! You may remember Lysa as Catelyn’s sister who frequently breastfed her way-too-old son Robin (Lino Facioli), a sadistic little simpleton who likes to make people “fly” through his “moon door.” Where on earth are the “Game of Thrones” casting directors finding these creepy little children? 

Lysa is eager to marry Baelish right away, because, and there’s no other way to put this, she is horny as fuck. While smooching on Baelish, she reminds him that she herself poisoned her husband John Arryn, at Littlefinger’s behest. (Remember John Arryn, the Hand of the King in Season 1? Ned Stark went to King’s Landing to replace him, and discovered that Cersei’s kids didn’t belong to Robert Baratheon but to Jaime, and Ned suspected the Lannisters of poisoning him to keep that secret.) Baelish makes out with her to shut her up, and oh look, she’s got wedding officiants right here. She warns them all she’s going to scream during their wedding night and she does, which poor Sansa has to listen to. Damn those thin-walled castles. 

The next night, Lysa brings Sansa a plate of sweets and shames her for snacking in the form of a story about her mother getting fat but also needing to “remain desirable.” God, it’s like, if you aren’t getting raped, you’re having to diet. Westeros sucks for women! Of course this turns into Lysa questioning Sansa about Littlefinger’s good treatment and affection for her, indicating that Littlefinger’s long standing love for Catelyn would have something to do with his treatment of Sansa. She accuses her of sleeping with Littlefinger, and Sansa gives an admirable performance of crying and denying, enough so that Lysa believes her, comforts her and promises her to be married to little Robin. Blech, there is so much little boy marrying in this show. Ick ick ick. 

Riverlands Somewhere? 
Arya (Maisie Williams) is keeping the Hound (Rory McCann) up with her incessant recitation of all the people she has to kill (notice Beric Dondarrion and Thoros of Myr have made the list). She’s even got her traveling companion and his brother on the list (though it seems the Hound wants to kill his brother, the Mountain, too). In the morning, Arya is practicing her water dancing sword fighting training, taught to her by Syrio Forel, The Greatest Swordsman in the World. It’s understood that Syrio Forel was killed in Season 1 by Meryn Trant et al., when they came for Arya. The Hound wants to see her moves, and demonstrates to her that fighting dirty, armor, and a “big fucking sword” can sometimes be more powerful than fancy footwork. 

Outside King’s Landing
Our favorite new show, the Pod n’ Brienne show, is going great! In this week’s episode, Pod (Daniel Porter) can’t ride a horse OR cook a rabbit. What a city slicker! Eventually, Brienne (Gwendoline Christie) comes to respect him when he tells her he killed a King’s Guard by putting a spear in the back of his head. Yo, Brienne, you got messed up standards for your friends, tho. 

Craster’s Keep 
Over at Craster’s Keep, the crazy, violent, abuse-y, rape-y party is over, cause the Night’s Watch are about to pounce. Locke (Noah Taylor) is hilariously sneaking around the grounds, doing a lot of head-swiveling, scoping out the joint. He clocks Bran (Isaac Hempsted-Wright) and pals in a shed, and when he goes back to relay his recon to Jon Snow (Kit Harington) and the rest of the Night’s Watch on Craster’s Keep raiding duty, he mentions they should avoid the hut where they have “hounds chained up inside” and promises they will carve up those bad guys “like walnut pie.” Meanwhile, in the hut, Jojen (Thomas Brodie-Sangster) is having visions of the magic tree and telling Bran he has to make it to the tree, that it’s his responsibility. Also his hand is randomly on fire. 

Creepface Karl (Burn Gorman) shows up to torment and threaten assault to Meera (Ellie Kendrick). He is totally gross. Jojen distracts him by being like “woo I’m psychic I see you dying tonight!” and it actually works, especially when the Night’s Watch storms the Keep. Good timing! Also, Jojen’s psychic vision is such a relief for us viewers right now. 

Snow and the boys show up and slash a bunch of terrible mutineers. Meanwhile, Locke sneaks off to kidnap Bran. Quickly, Bran wargs into Hodor (Kristian Nairn), who rips loose of his chains with HULK POWER, follows Locke into the woods, and straight up liberates Locke’s neck from his head with his bare hands, while possessed by Bran. However, it’s clear he’s pretty freaked out by the blood on his hands. While Bran watches Snow kicking ass and taking names in battle, he crawls to reach him, but Jojen reminds him that reuniting with Jon will only take him off the path towards the magic tree and the three-eyed raven. Bran sadly agrees and says they need to get Summer and peace out. 

Jon faces off with Karl in the hut, one broadsword vs. two knives. Karl’s taunting him about how Jon fights with honor, a nobleman, and that’s not his style. Karl’s fighting dirty, just like the Hound fighting dirty with Arya, but he doesn’t anticipate the knife in the back he receives from one of the Craster women. Before he can retaliate, Jon drives his sword straight through the back of his head and and through his mouth in a delightfully phallic and violating way. If only our gal had been able have the pleasure of doing that to Karl. As the Night’s Watch count the dead, Rast (Luke Barnes), who’s run off into the woods, gets ripped by what can only be dire wolf, Ghost, in the ultimate vengeance to his torturer. Ghost quickly reunites with his owner, Jon. Snow invites the remaining women of Craster’s Keep to the Wall to escape Mance Rayder’s army, but the ladies are like, “Umm, NUH UH, y’all homeboys did us wrong, burn this place to the ground, and we OUT.” Who can blame them really. They’ve had enough of men for awhile. Can’t wait to see what their badass all-women camp turns into. 

In following with the “Game of Thrones” ebb and flow of dramatic episodes vs. story building episodes, this one decidedly resides in the latter camp, though what happens at Craster’s Keep is much more violent and action-packed than the rest of the episode. There are many deaths among the Night’s Watch and mutineers, but they are throwaways, really, and treated as such, with the exception of Locke. “First of His Name” was also directed by Michelle McLaren, and while a strong episode considering the context, it’s not entirely compelling, and much of the fight scenes were dim and confusing. And, as the series diverges more and more from the books, it’s really wide open as to where it will go in the latter half of the season. 





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Comments

Dan

I know there are lots of complicated things going on in every episode of this fascinating show, but Katie and many of the commentors seem to miss the fact that occasionally we're given an insight into what motivates these characters to do the horrible things that they do. Why does Jaime rape his sister in front of the corpse of their dead son? Because (as we learned earlier) he sat in piles of his own shit, walked hundreds of miles, had his hand chopped off, all just to get back to her – driven by his (admittedly) sick love for her. No excuse at all for raping her, but it wasn't just because there was nothing good on TV that day.

And why does Tywin abuse and villify his own children? Because his gold has run out and he is at the mercy of the Iron Bank. Maybe he was a shitty dad before that, but the stress of impending bankruptcy has made him 10 times shittier. It's fine if you want to see these scenes as boring or gratuitous, but it's clear that the writers (of the book and the show) are using them to give us a peek behind the curtain. It's not always pretty back there.

Jason

Well, looks like the controversy hasn't done anything to dissuade fans of the show. According to a post on Huffingtonpost today, Cersei is the most hated character on the show according to 43% of respondents. Jaime? 1%.

monica

i hope they do not continue to show these atrocities on tv , i was raped and impregnated by a homeless man when i was 14 and i am 36 now. my son watches this show and is horrified by it.
its just tv , and what happened to me is every womans worst nightmare , but i personally do not want to see it on tv , i will just not watch.

Ze

I agree with Katie and the rape stuff. Yes, rape happens. But it's a very serious and terrible thing. What sucks about GoT isn't that rape happens on the show, but HOW it happens. It's so casual, like it's no big deal, like… hey, let's have a bunch more rape scenes and a "No, No, No, Yes" scene with Cersei and Jamie just to shock people. What's next, showing scenes of children being raped? It's stupid. This whole f***ing show is stupid, and this episode finally convince me to stop watching it.

Ian Cooper

Season 4 started well, but these last two episodes have been kinda dull. It's almost as if, as they meander from the source material, all the Game of Thrones greatness gets lost. Now while it's true that George R.R. Martin's characters can lack a bit of motivation ON OCCASION , the TV series seems hell-bent on having characters do stuff "just because" ALL THE TIME – Jaime raping Cersei is a great example.

franky

Why sum white nerd b*tchez gotta b all like talkin' street when they be recappin' medieval high fantasy TV shows, know wha' I'm sayin'? It's like straight up posturin', G. Don't they b realizin' dat sh*t gonna sound like hella dated n like 1 year? Talk to the hand, don't go there.

Joe

Crikey, seems like a lot of people here have no sense of humour at all (yes, I'm British hence the extra 'u').

I thought your article was refreshingly well written and enjoyed your entertaining recap having just watched the episode.

It's depressing that there are so many negative comments and sniffy people calling into question the article's professionalism. Wow. I mean, it's a lighthearted point of view piece not a treatise for peace between, um, mortal enemies?

Anyway, I get it. It's not hard to get if you're not judgmental. Because the Craster Keep fight scenes were so dimly lit it (and the Crows are all wearing black etc), it's difficult to make out what's going on in the melee in such a short space of time, so it was 'dim and confusing' in this respect is how I read it. How people can take fault of such observations is hard to appreciate. Relax.

Now, onto my opinion… The last two GoT episodes have been really weird and disappointing in *my view*. I understand the creative need for deviation in storyline between the books and the show – yes, I read all the books too – but I think they've gone too far off beam with some of the plotlines of late. I can't pretend to remember (or even perhaps fully appreciate) some of the deeper intricacies and undercurrents circling around in the GoT novels but I felt the overall nuance of characters and their relationships with each other had been conveyed pretty well until now. I mean, you hold out and reserve judgment to a point but I feel things have nose dived pretty spectacularly of late in some of the storylines as they take too many liberties reflecting those more subtle, um, nuances.

SPOILER ALERT: It's really clear Cersi starts to totally lose it and her relationship with Jaime completely breaks down. I think it was quite clear this relationship had fundamentally altered at the end of last season so a simple continuation would have served better than a very clumsy rape scene at Joff's lying in state. As far as I recall, they did bonk each other in the book at this point but I don't remember it being flat out rape like this. Did I forget something? This episode really breaks the redemptive Jaime story – yeah, the characters are multilayered yadda yadda – so the future Jaime plotline is not going to have the same impact it otherwise could have done (ie – the audience is with him then he does something terrible [again] and betrays them). This is the point – a man beyond redemption finds some small part of it with Brienne. So wtf have they done? Gone for a shocker prematurely I guess?

Can't remember Craster's Keep Part Three: The Revenge of the Crows in the books. Made sense to go shut the surviving defecting black cloaks up but was it all really necessary? I think the show's creators wasted loads of screen time with this when they ought to have been focusing more on the impending threat of Mance and building up his attack on the Wall. I'd like to see several episodes of the battle in the detail they promised when they mentioned there'd be an expensive battle fought (ie – battle scenes cost a lot to produce in filmmaking terms).

Well, anyway… I'm not hanging around here to get flamed and chewed up by all the highly strung humourless bro-fos here. My first visit and all. I just wanted to say nice article, very amusing and well written. Don't let the whiners grind you down.

Joe Crow
X

Regina

Look at all the defensive men in the world…

Dylan

Wow. Some people are just way too serious over this. If you don't like the review then go somewhere else to find something of your liking. There are so many reviews out there that writes serious GOT reviews. Why slam this writer for her way of writing? So if it's not what you like, it's not right?

Need more insight

Can we please write more about all the amazing details that were part of this last episode?

First, how do you gloss over the fact that Lady Arryn mentions how she poisoned her own husband with the help of Littlefinger? Argueably setting in motion this entire story! It really gives you a much bigger appreciation for Petyr Baelish and how much he really really impacts the story line, yet goes so unnoticed by the major players. This is major information and so much a part of these characters.

Lady Arryn is depicted more and more like Cercei than we realize as she brings Sansa into a false sense of security discussing her mother and making Sansa feel like she is safe. Only to turn 'crazed' over her jealousy and thoughts that her husband may have 'had his way' with Sansa at some point. Is Sansa really as safe as she thought? Can we not mention the character similarities here?

Arya and The Hound – again, missing the entire point. At the end when The Hound explains that Arya's hero is only dead because of 'armor and a big f**king sword' shows us that The Hound may just be the best teacher Arya has had, despite the fact he is on her 'list'.

Katie dear — please don't complain about character development unless you fully understand and realize how these characters are being developed. How even something that appears so small and insignificant, can change the direction of a relationship or character development in this show. I feel that is where the disconnect is. I feel that you think that much of what the writers and directors are portraying on the show is not part of character development. Yet in the end, I don't read anything from you that shows you understand how characters are being developed.

Agreed

Hi Katie,
Thanks for writing that. I was also disappointed with the way the show has continued to portray violence to women on the show. Not necessarily mad that they show it, but there appears to be no consequence for any character involved, and in the case of Jamie, all was forgotten and he was praised. Shows like Sons of Anarchy, The Americans, House of Cards, Top of the Lake, have shown rape, but there is some form of character development related to the rape.
I hope all the comments on the board do not discourage you from writing, as I know many viewers who agree with what you have said.

Smart-y Pants

Who cares if you hate the show or the rape. I could care less. But, wtf is with '-y'. Abuse-y, exposition-y, incest-y, rape-y. UGH! Give it a rest! If you can't think of proper words that adequately portray the feeling or centiment of the scene, just stop writing.

Reese Mo

Suggestion: Read the books. It will give you a more clear perspective on some of the things that you take issue with and give you a better understanding of Game of Thrones.

J

Rape is part of nature and life. It's realistic. This is realistic drama and realistic fantasy. Many people like it for that. It doesn't mean people like rape. Get over yourself.

It's the same as complaining people are getting killed a lot in the show. They do. It's what happens. It's life.

Lars

Hey now, don't drag George R. R. Martin in with the showrunners when it comes to depictions of rape. There have been two consensual sex scenes turned to rape scenes one intentional and one unintentional (which is sad). The entire plot of Bran being captured by deserters at Craster's Keep is a show invention that allows for them to threaten Meera Reed with rape. It's stupid and makes me worry if all the sexual violence towards women on this show has gone from the realm of realism to exploitation. The show seems to dwell in sexual violence, including the torture of Theon Greyjoy where the books only hint.

Makath

Odd you called the Lannister-Tyrell double marriage incest-y but missed out on the actual one, considering Sansa and Robin are first degree cousins.

David

You seem to be an angry female that is angry about a make believe world. I will make one example of your review where you blend your agenda into the review, although there are many others:

You wrote:
"As Oberyn promises the safe-keeping of her daughter Myrcella, Cersei very tellingly states, "everywhere in the world they hurt little girls." Sad, and true. As they look over the water, Cersei asks him to take Myrcella a present—a tall ship sitting in the harbor. Is this for Myrcella to make an escape? Start a revolt? Take an afternoon sail? It's a poignant and humane moment for Cersei. "

Here I have fixed it for you as depicted in the episode"
Oberyn: "We don't hurt little girls in Dorn."
Why did you not include this in your narrative? The dialogue and the delivery completely makes me think that her sister is safe. But then again I have not read the books. Just curious why you did not include the pivotal dialogue in your narrative?

Stallone

I enjoy your writing, but truly, your first paragraph is a real turn-off to potential readers. You spend far too much time writing about all the "haters," preaching about your ethical virtuosity, which drives away nearly everyone.

Jason B

Well, I have never read your articles before, but after the diatribe in the first paragraph I never will. Pro tip: berating and abusing your readership in your introductory paragraph is not a sustainable approach to journalism.

Mike

Jaime did not rape Cersei. I'm not making parallels to what defines rape in our society and all that mumbo jumbo; I'm just putting out there that in the storyline of Game of Thrones no rape took place. There was no rape in the books and there was no rape on the show. I know it looked like rape but it wasn't intended to. It's funny how the author attacks people "defending rape" in the comments. She obviously hasn't read the books and doesn't understand that the misconception of rape doesn't effect the arc of the character because it was never supposed to be rape. If it helps, pretend that Cercei enjoys rough role-play and her safe words are, "I will cut off your dick if you put it near me." We just missed the episode where they established that in their teenage years.

Also, I've been with a woman who enjoyed physically resisting at first as part of play. If you didn't know our sexual relationship and randomly threw a camera in the room you'd think I was raping her, when in actuality it was something we established together as lovers. It freaked me out at first, but hey, that's what she was into; I knew where the lines were and I did it for her. Does that make me a rapist? I know Cercei wasn't raped because I read the books and have that extra information, not because of what was seen on the show. The directors also knew what I knew and failed to portray it correctly for the masses. Rape is despicable. Onward.

I agree with her in her assessment of the rape depicted in episode four and understand why a woman would be bothered by it, as I myself was bothered. I hope that was the purpose though– to bother us and make us hate the mutineers. The problem is that there has been so much sexposition and gratuitous sex in Game of Thrones that the Crastor Keep scene could easily be portrayed in that same light, and using rape as sexposition to turn people on is wrong. I'll jump in with the feminists on that one if that's what they did.

I didn't mind the tone of the review. I knew she was joking with the little commentaries and they didn't bother me. It was well written and kept my interest throughout. I guess what confuses me is this:

"Jon drives his sword straight through the back of his head and and through his mouth in a delightfully phallic and violating way. If only our gal had been able have the pleasure of doing that to Karl."

You're sensitive to rape but just described a grisly killing where a man shoved a sword through the back of another man's skull and out through his mouth using a sexual overtone like the sword raped him. That's a little messed up. I'm with you. It's just hypocritical and messed up.

manner

MORE RAPE!! i hope they continue the rapes as a tribute to the smithering c*nt that wrote this. f*ck you c*nt!

Germar Derron

Just because of your intro I'll come back here to read each week. looktothecookie.org/2014/05/game-of-thrones-first-of-his-name.html

mars

you sound like a teenager who hates cockroaches with passion. such a long article to be wasted on getting all squeamish.

Doug

This whole article sounds like it was written by a junior high school girl for her school newspaper. At no point was I ever able to take it seriously. This is my first time reading a review on Playlist, shame I have to give you my email, it will be my last. Just knowing that this person has written more than one review makes me shudder at the thought at what else might lie in wait for me on this site, and what middle school kids might be hiring the writers. If you cant handle the content Katie, then start reviewing Disney films, they seem to be more in line to your obviously delicate sensibilities.

Your casual commentary, filled with purposeful misspellings and slang, designed to capture the minds of an audience that is probably of an age that shouldn't be watching this show, show that the folk that manage this site have placed way to much confidence in your abilities, and have either neglected to check your references when you applied to be a writer here, or it shows that it takes no qualifications at all.

To those of you who enjoyed this style of writing, though I can't fathom why, please, return to your People magazines, where this sort of rhetoric runs aplenty, and stop diminishing the pool of reviews where others are actually looking for opinions from writers who know what they are talking about, have the maturity to write about it, and don't fill their articles with excerpts from conversations they had at lunch before their home economics class.

john

What's sad, Katie, is your unwillingness to acknowledge that this episode in particular provided more than "vengeance" for the victimized female characters that you've so vehemently spoken up for. Given your strong stance on how the show depicts women, I'm confused how you could sum such a female-power-centric episode up as "not entirely compelling" and "dim and confusing." All you have to say about the women of Craster's Keep deciding to live on their own rather than take refuge with the Night's Watch or to continue to live in the place of their torment is "we OUT"?

Aside from the women at Craster's Keep, Cersei's scene with the Red Viper in the gardens is particularly compelling given her own recent rape. This scene expertly depicts the emotional transformation that her violent encounter with Jaime has had on her, with specific regard to her daughter's precarious situation and the general treatment of women in the realm.

If commenting on your mockingly written posts is sad then how exactly should we categorize the attitude with which you've chosen to write about this show? If you'd like your POV to be taken seriously perhaps you should cut the puns, read the books and save the vitriolic discourse until you've allowed the show's writers/creators to fully develop the storyline of the characters.

h.

its ok , she doesnt understand the premise of the story and times , pretty soon it will be w"why so much blood? "

Thatguy

Don't write with a chip on your shoulder the size if a vag!!

Kel

I love reading your reviews and find your writing hilarious. I disagree with some of the comments below. Clearly some people have no sense of humor. I find it extremely entertaining with your random casualness juxtaposed against such a serious show like GOT. You made me laughed out loud a few times. Keep up the good work.

LaviniaC

Well regardless of the other comments, I enjoyed your narrative.

jakob dylan

i was going to commend you on a better written article this week, but you lost it halfway through with more of your teenage girl vocabulary and inane illustrations. you really should be writing the recaps for Glee. you should stick with what you do well, and when you focus on the show you do write well. just leave out all the nonsense such as "Umm, NUH UH, y'all homeboys did us wrong, burn this place to the ground, and we OUT." are you seriously a professional writer? i sincerely hope not.

Jim

I read your pathetic opening paragraph and I refused to read a review of someone so stupid

Aaron

"Brienne (Gwendoline Christie) comes to respect him when he tells her he killed a King's Guard by putting a spear in the back of his head. Yo, Brienne, you got messed up standards for your friends, tho. "

WRONG. Brienne respects him not because of the killing, but because of his loyalty, because he has risked his life to protect Tyrion whom he was squiring for.

bberman

Awesome review, hilarious. I have really been wanting to see a meme go around showing Martin, Benihoff and Weiss photoshopped onto naked guys getting 'raped' and see how comfy that makes all the whiners about how 'it's not really rape' etc. feel. Not so much? Right. Anyway, love that you have fun with the series and it's not another one of those pompous GOT sacred cow reviews.

gabe

wow anna… you mad bro???

Hey i think you did a great job, it was a lot of fun to read this keep it up!

Andrew

That collective sigh when Daenerys decides to stay in Meereen. We'll see how long this lasts, probably forever at this point.

Anna

What's sad is that someone who belongs on some imdb message board – that opening paragraph is pathetic – is allowed to write their recaps on this site. Playlist, get yourselves some professionals, not this pitiful amateur.

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