You will be redirected back to your article in seconds
Back to IndieWire

Force This Woman Watch The ‘Entourage’ Movie By Helping Raise Money For Pediatric Cancer

Force This Woman Watch The 'Entourage' Movie By Helping Raise Money For Pediatric Cancer

We hate us some “Entourage” and love us creative ways people try and raise money for good causes, and this pretty amazing Go Fund Me campaign has merged them both.

Wendy Molyneux Drake launched a campaign that if $10,000 was donated to pediatric cancer, she would face her worst cinematic nightmare:

If you know me at all, you know there are two things I hate: pediatric cancers and the television show Entourage. I am attempting to raise 10K to donate to CureSearch. Find out more about CureSearch here.  In exchange for that I will go see the movie Entourage. Watch the terrifying preview of Entourage here. It’s just that simple. Please give five dollars or ten thousand dollars. Or please don’t because I really don’t want to see Entourage. It’s up to you: give some money and help children with cancer and make me see Entourage, or keep your money and I won’t have to see Entourage. No matter how much this makes, all of the money will go directly to CureSearch. I will not use the money even for my own ticket to see the worst movie of the year and possibly our lifetime. I will also use my own money to buy tickets to Entourage for anyone who chooses the Date With Wendy (And Her Husband) premium or higher. If you give 150 dollars or more to this page, I will buy you one (1) ticket to watch me watch Entourage. But if I don’t make ten thousand dollars for CureSearch, I will not see Entourage.  If I make $9,999, will I see Entourage? No, no I won’t. I hope you don’t give any money, honestly, because of how much I hate Entourage. Okay, it’s your decision. Cancer and me not seeing Entourage, or forcing me to see Entourage in a THEATER FULL  OF PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY WANT TO SEE ENTOURAGE and money to cure pediatric cancers.

Within just two days, over $16,000 was raised, leaving Wendy in a bit of a pickle. Even “Entourage” actor Jerry Ferrara donated to the campaign after Wendy’s campaign went viral:

Well, yesterday was a very terrible, gross day where all the generous monsters of the world decided it was a GREAT IDEA to not only make me see Entourage, but also to put me in Drama Mama Pajamas and make me carry a Turtle cup at the movies. And then, a very inhuman person at The Hollywood Reporter publicized this at the very moment that I hoped I would be spared from seeing this thing twice:

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/bob-s-burgers-writer-raises-798775. 

Disgusting. AND TURTLE HIMSELF, Jerry Ferrara, gave money for pediatric cancer research just to make sure that I had to go to this. I think we always knew there was an evil heart beating inside those sneakers. That’s where the heart is, right? In the foot? I DON’T KNOW I AM NOT A DOCTOR. Anyway, thanks/fuck off, America. I need to go look into changing my identity and leaving the country to avoid this terrible fate. BUT BEFORE I DO, if you INSIST on continuing to donate to this cause, let me tell you a little bit about why it is important to my family:

In 2013, my beautiful, amazing, funny, smart nephew Oliver died from cancer. He is seen in this picture with his family on his preschool graduation day (he’s the littlest one on the left in the blue shirt). Shortly after that picture was taken, Oliver got Leukemia, and faced an ordeal that no child should ever have to go through before losing his life at age 5. My sisterJenny and brother-in-law Brian are amazing parents who suffer terribly from this loss even though they’ve also shown amazing strength. Oliver’s brothers miss him every day. I loved that little banana like crazy. CureSearch aggressively goes after cures EXCLUSIVELY for children’s cancers, and that’s why CureSearch will receive all this money in Oliver Cross’s name. Oliver’s parents chose this charity in the hope is that someday no child will have to go through the nightmare he endured. Of course, none of us anticipated that it would make this much money because we did not anticipate the dark, horrible generosity of your hearts, jerks.

So, now, DO WITH THAT INFORMATION WHAT YOU WILL. If I wind up seeing Entourage seventy-five times, then I leave you alone with your conscience, you sociopaths.

Wendy has now promised to see the film another time for each additional $10k raised. Make her!

This Article is related to: Features and tagged