Review: ‘Girls’ Season 5 Episode 1, ‘Wedding Day’: Marnie Walks Down the Aisle

Review: ‘Girls’ Season 5 Episode 1, ‘Wedding Day’: Marnie Walks Down the Aisle

Love Her or Hate Her

Let’s divide this one up for the premiere, shall we? On one hand there’s Hannah, who is completely oblivious to her responsibilities as a bridesmaid/maid of honor for Marnie’s wedding. She refuses to style her hair according to the bride, invites her boyfriend to hang out during girl time and runs out to have sex because… well it’s a very stressful day for her. Then there’s Marnie, who so desperately wants Desi to marry her that she’s ignoring all of the warning signs and plunging ahead in a bridezilla haze. To make matters worse, she insists on a hippie wedding that embraces her musical “talent,” which continues to ring false since she’s about as high maintenance as they come. The bottom line? They’re both pretty unlikeable in the premiere as we see just how far their friendship has fallen.

READ MORE: Lena Dunham’s ‘Girls’ Ending After Season 6

Something to Cringe About

Anyone who witnessed Adam and Jessa grow closer last season knew the moment in which they crossed that friendship line was drawing near. Whether it was Jessa’s method of running through a meadow to dry herself, or if it was the hair curlers in her head that made her a little more human in Adam’s eyes is hard to tell. Either way, that kiss felt inevitable and messed up all at once. Jessa doesn’t seem like the one to spill the beans out of guilt going forward, but Adam certainly fits that bill. Especially if he and Hannah truly do continue to circle around each other.

A Growth Spurt

If Desi truly has been engaged eight times but is finally ready to tie the knot (thanks to a little unintentional probing from Ray), perhaps we should all be giving him the benefit of the doubt and begin to believe in this marriage… said no one ever. Still, the character deserves kudos for making it this far, and we can’t wait to see how Marnie believes being married will change their relationship. Spoiler alert: Marriage never actually fixes a damned thing.

How Many Shots to Forget About…

Hannah’s rearranging of her bridesmaid dress post-coitus? Sure, it was amusing to see her complete lack of interest in the day, but Hannah has pulled off some pretty gnarly styles over the years. You would think she’d be able to arrange a crisscross halter dress, especially after presumably trying it on a few times beforehand. The only thing that would have made it worth it was if she had walked down the aisle that way.

Marital Bliss

If Marnie is now married, does that mean she graduates from Girl to Woman?

Making Up

Whose makeup-up was worse: Marnie’s or Sarah’s on the Season 2 premiere of “Transparent”? Both were completely made-over, with dark brows, eyes and lips that were truly terrifying. Sure, it would have worked on Elvira, perhaps. Luckily, Jessa was there to save the day—either out of guilt or a sudden burst of calmness. Whatever it was, all four of the girls and Marnie’s mom wound up looking pretty spectacular considering the spackle that was going on with their faces an hour earlier.

A Little Japanese Influence

Does Japan ever look good on Shoshanna… er, spiritually at least. The blonde hair is still throwing us, but in terms of overall demeanor we’ve never seen the character this calm and put together. It’s also nice to see her reveling in something that she’s apparently successful at: She’s always carried a sense of accomplishment with her, but in the past has often seemed dragged down by her friendships with the others. Perhaps fleeing the country for a little bit did her some good. Now we just can’t wait to see what living in Japan actually looks like for her.

Guy of the Week

Oh Ray… you’ve put yourself into the permanent friend zone now, buddy. While your chances with Marnie have pretty much been washed away, we’re still behind the lake scene that got us there. Way to drown those sorrows, man.

This Week in Friendship

No one can fight like this fab foursome, but no one can make up like them either. Given that this was probably the last time we’ll see all four of the characters together for a while, it was nice to see them leave it on a high note. Especially since we have a feeling that between Jessa’s indiscretion, Marnie’s new martial status and Shosh being halfway across the world, things are about to get a whole lot worse for Hannah’s friendships.

Grade: B

“Girls” airs Sundays at 10pm on HBO.
Next week: Fran and Hannah move in together, causing a whole new string of growing pains.

READ MORE: How Lena Dunham and Jenni Konner Helped Their ‘Girls’ Boom Op Make His Sundance Doc

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