15 year old-yoga-nuts Colleen Collette and Colleen McKenzie love their smart phones and hate their after school job at Manitoban convenience store Eh-2-Zed. But when an ancient evil rises from beneath Canada’s crust and threatens their big invitation to a Grade 12 party, the Colleens join forces with the legendary man-hunter from Montreal named Guy Lapointe to fight for their lives with all seven Chakras, one Warrior Pose at a time.
An irreverent American podcaster interviews a Canadian adventurer whose wild tale of survival at sea masks sinister intentions in this twisted horror comedy from writer/director Kevin Smith (Clerks, Red State). Wallace (Justin Long) and Teddy (Haley Joel Osment) are the wisecracking co-hosts of “The Not-See Party”, a popular podcast focused on bizarre viral videos and humorous interviews with the internet-famous. The concept is simple – Wallace travels the country conducting outlandish videos, and returns to their make-shift studio to share his stories with Teddy and the listeners. When Wallace ventures to Canada for an interview that falls through at the last minute, he stops at a local bar for a drink and finds a flyer posted by an old adventurer (Michael Parks) who seeks to share his stories with anyone who will listen.
Arriving at the old man’s secluded estate under the shroud of darkness, Wallace is promptly treated to a hot cup of tea, and a strange tale of being rescued by a walrus following a shipwreck at sea. It all seems like the perfect fodder for an unforgettable podcast — that is until Wallace blacks out and regains consciousness bound to a wheelchair. Meanwhile, as Teddy and Wallace’s girlfriend venture north to investigate his sudden disappearance, the old man subjects his terrified guest to a bizarre medical procedure that will transform more than just his perception of one of the sea’s most majestic creatures.