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Google Buys Mumblecore for $1.6 Billion

Google Buys Mumblecore for $1.6 Billion

Thanks to Todd Rohal for forwarding me this late-breaking news. A major indie-film announcement has hit the wire:

GOOGLE BUYS MUMBLECORE FOR 1.3 BILLION, HOLLYWOOD REACTS

REUTERS – New York, NY – In an overnight pact that will certainly set a few creative heads spinning, Internet giant GOOGLE (NYSE:GOOG, links, clips) purchased lo-fi independent film movement MUMBLECORE (links, clips, blogs) for a hefty sum of 1.3 billion dollars. Sources say that the film trend, sparked in part by movies like Joe Swanberg’s “Hannah Takes The Stairs,” Andrew Bujalski’s “Mutual Appreciation” and Dan Ireland’s “Mrs. Palfrey at the Claremont,” is only the beginning of what will soon become a massive shift in cinematic culture.

“Imagine the changes set off in filmmaking that were caused by Sundance, Cannes and Star Wars, add those together, multiply that by thirty and I think you’ll have an idea of the scope of what this is,” said an industry insider who refused to be named, but did note that he has his own Mumblecore project in the works already, “After seeing the success of ‘Hannah’ I realized that anyone has the ability to make a movie nowadays and that movie doesn’t need to have special effects, big stars, a script, lights, or even a crew. I’m basically just editing together my kid’s old birthday videos into what I hope will be considered the ‘Paper Moon’ of Mumblecore.”

Through its purchase, Google will now own the rights to any movie shot on video without the use of a tripod. “We’re really excited about this,” said Google executive Harry Conrad, “It’ll be like YouTube, but only with a bit more class and critical acclaim.”

Mumblecore certainly hasn’t fallen on deaf ears in Hollywood. Cameras on the set of the new Steven Spielberg/George Lucas INDIANA JONES sequel were literally set ablaze as Lucas declared the entire set a “Mumble Zone”. The entire 130-person crew was fired without notice as Spielberg made a sudden shift to shooting the multi-million dollar spectacle on Hi-8 video himself. “Mumble in the jungle, baby,” the director said at a press conference from the set in Hawaii, “Steve on camera, Georgie on boom, that’s how it’s being done from here on out.”

“We’re really excited about what this ‘Moviement’ will inspire,” Conrad elaborated, “It’s an exciting time. Mumblecore instantlymakes everyone an filmmaker now…there’s no more artistic struggling needed!”

Film festival submissions to this year’s Sundance Film Festival are now expected to top over 6 million, a massive increase over last year’s already record-setting season of submissions from 2006. “We are desperately trying to figure out a way to screen all of the entries before 2010. The films are coming in so fast, many of them don’t even have titles yet.”

When pressed on why Google felt the urge to jump on this movement while most are still unaware of it, Conrad responded by saying “These days you’ve really got to jump on a trend before the trend jumps on you.”

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Ed. Note: I love Todd Rohal.

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