Everyone’s favorite worthless waste of muppet-faced space, Tom O’Neil, made a pithy statement on his hilarious, always-wrong Oscar prognostication website (Dreamgirls will win Best Picture…doh; Sweeney Todd will win…doh!), calling out the GLAAD awards for its apparent lack of edge for not including The Kite Runner in its citation of great gay films.
O…….kay….The Kite Runner, right…well, I do recall that deliriously erotic child-on-child same-sex rape scene, in which a young sadistic bully, in a show of fascistic aggression, viciously rapes another young boy because he disapproves of his perceived inferior race, that of Hazara. With discreet cutaways, Marc Forster edits around the offense, but in the end shows a single droplet of blood from the poor victim’s wounded anal cavity splashing to the ground (At Slant, Ed Gonzalez memorably compared it to a syrup drizzle over a stack of golden pancakes, if memory serves.)
Then, as a result of shooting this sequence, the actors involved had to be taken to safe havens so that their lives would be spared after bristling homophobia in their homeland.
O’Neil calls The Kite Runner a great film with a gay subtext. And then muses, Why did GLAAD wimp out? Well, there’s no accounting for taste (The Kite Runner….great? come the fuck on…), but there should be some accounting for really poor taste. O’Neil, take your sock-puppet mouth and googly eyes and finally go far, far away. Perhaps to that magical land of soaring digital kites, where boys learn how to be men, and men learn how to wear sticky beards.