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Eating With Oscar

Eating With Oscar

Since it is looking more and more likely (or not.. maybe we should once and for all learn to not trust the mouse and his past or present henchmen) that the strike is over and sixteen days from now we can all enjoy the Academy Awards as planned.

To get the ball rolling, Epicurious has a very ambitious potential selection of menus laid out for those who like to host on Oscar night:

While we cant guarantee the Oscars will be as regal as in years past, we can promise one thing: Whatever the outcome, there will be food! In honor of this year’s awards, we’ve created five movie-themed menus, each loosely representing one of the Best Picture nominees.

Atonement, a sweeping period drama that unravels on an English estate, gets a formal British dinner, while the hearty menu we’ve put together for No Country for Old Men takes inspiration from the American Southwest. For There Will Be Blood, we’ve chosen rustic fare fit for a turn-of-the-century prospector, including homemade bread and bison short ribs, while for Michael Clayton, about an overworked Manhattan attorney, we’ve selected decadent mac & cheese and flourless chocolate cake, both comforting staples of many a city restaurant. Rounding out our movie selection, Juno’s menu brings together an eclectic mix of fun kid-friendly finger foods, from waffle sandwiches to lemon bars.

Stick with one menu, or pick and choose dishes from any or all of them for an Oscar party worthy of rave reviews.

Blood‘s menu includes “Warm Goat Cheese Salad with Pears and Walnuts,” while Atonement‘s suggests “Beef Wellingtons with Gorgonzola”.

Personally, I don’t think have the time, energy, or – honestly – the culinary abilities to pull any of that off, and I have a feeling I’m not in the minority there. So I suggest a menu that’s lame and obvious (just like the Oscars themselves!), because nobody really goes to Oscar parties for gourmet meals.

Start off with the most ambitious: an appetizer of ratatouille (whatever that is). Then for the main course just make some hamburgers and stick some old phone cords in them (Juno, duh). For a side dish, get a big brown bag of baguettes, and serve them right out of the bag with a good crazy look on your face (a la Tom Wilkinson in Michael Clayton). And for desert, make every milkshakes but then go around and slurp them all up angrily before anyone gets a chance to drink them. Do it all wearing a green dress and make sure you call everyone “friendo” and you’ve served a quick, easy and hilarious meal that covers all five best picture nominees and an animated film to boot. Take that, Epicurious.

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