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‘Kung Fu Panda’ & ‘Alvin & The Chipmunks’ Writer To Turn ‘Candyland’ Into A Narrative Somehow

'Kung Fu Panda' & 'Alvin & The Chipmunks' Writer To Turn 'Candyland' Into A Narrative Somehow

At the beginning of 2010, we named “Candyland” as one of the dumbest movies announced in 2009 and even with all the bullshit movies announced last year none of them really compete with this one yet. And now, the project is actually moving forward with a writer who will now be whispered about at parties, “You see that guy? He wrote ‘Candyland’…..I know.”

Variety reports that Jonathan Aibel and Glenn Berger are unafraid, and will be putting “Candyland,” if not on their resume, then on IMDB for whole world to see and laugh about.

Aibel — responsible for “Kung Fu Panda,” “Monsters Vs. Aliens” and the “Alvin And The Chipmunks” sequels — will team with Berger to spin a compelling narrative which requires little more cognitive effort than spinning a wheel and matching colors. It’s like trying to make a movie out of connect-the-dots though we’re sure some asshole producer is pitching that in a boardroom somewhere.

Universal is actually going to spend money on this thing. Their first Hasbro related game, “Battleship,” arrives on May 2nd and it has been turned into an alien invasion movie that involves Rihanna somehow. They’ve got “Ouija” on the way with McG directing which should provide it’s own barrel of unintentional laughs. And don’t even get us started on “Stretch Armstrong” and “Monopoly.” If “Slinky: The Movie” is ever announced, we officially give up.

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