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The Highs and Lows of the Meaningless 2014 MTV Movie Awards, from Shirtless Efron to Wahlberg’s F-Bombs (VIDEOS)

The Highs and Lows of the Meaningless 2014 MTV Movie Awards, from Shirtless Efron to Wahlberg's F-Bombs (VIDEOS)

“Welcome to the Satanic Cult Awards, ladies and gentleman!” was how host Conan O’Brien kicked off the meaningless MTV Movie Awards 2014 on Sunday night, and though it was an uneven, glitchy show filled with highs and lows, O’Brien was among the highs. (Clips after the jump.)

But there was, of course, shirtless Zac Efron, more brass than bronze and in attendance to promote his new film “Neighbors,” costarring Seth Rogen. Naturally Efron, after presenter Jessica Alba botched his name  (“Zeek Offram”), won the Best Shirtless Performance award for his January 2014 release “That Awkward Moment.” (The boys at /bent have compiled a nice set of GIFs of Efron’s shirt getting ripped off. Somewhere, Zeek Offram and Adele Dazeem are toasting to this.)

O’Brien, who’s always willing to degrade himself for a laugh, preened in a muscled nude shirt, and interrupted Channing Tatum, who was tearing up while accepting the Trailblazer Award, with a nude selfie. (Tatum deserves a prize for being a teflon movie star who’s often better than the film that contains him.) A heartfelt tribute to Paul Walker was, along with Tatum’s speech, among the evening’s more moving moments.

As for the awards themselves — hardly the focal point of the evening — typically, 2013 box office champ “The Hunger Games: Catching Fire” won Movie of the Year, with stars Jennifer Lawrence (not present) and Josh Hutcherson (dwarfed by hulking presenter Kate Upton) accepting awards for Female and Male Performance. “The Wolf of Wall Street” won Best #WTF Scene for, no contest, The ‘Lude Scene. “Wolf” star Jonah Hill also nabbed the Best Comedic Performance award from presenters Seth MacFarlane and Amanda Seyfried, who had a hard time reading the autocue without her contact lenses.

The award categories continue to confound. In what universe is Barkhad Abdi the “villain” of “Captain Phillips”? And how does nominee Orlando Bloom’s return to Legolas in “The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug” constitute an Onscreen Transformation? Oscar-winner Jared Leto, who hit the red carpet via helicopter, won for — again, no contest — won that category for his performance as a trans woman in “Dallas Buyers Club.” After some requisite hair-flipping, Leto delivered yet another inclusive, impassioned speech after accepting the prize from Academy Award winner Lupita Nyong’o, looking fab as always. (Watch after the jump.)

Mark Wahlberg, who has “Transformers: Age of Extinction” coming up this summer, gave the censors a run for their money when he accepted the Generation Award–trying to define the distinction between the Trailblazers award–joking, in his curse-fueled speech, “This is the ‘you’re-too-fucking-old-to-come-back’ award… This is not the Channing-Tatum-you’re-dancing-around-chicks award. This is the you’re-fucking-done award. But look, it was a great run.” Okay then. To be fair, he did take some time to thank his family before absconding the stage.

Read the full list of the evening’s winners via Variety here. Watch clips from the show after the jump.

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