Roses are red. Violets are blue. We hate Valentine’s Day. How about you?
OK, “hate” is an overstatement. At the very least, capitalism’s annual ode to the big L-O-V-E is an excellent excuse to revisit our favorite rom-coms and dramatic love stories. From “The Notebook” and “Moonlight” to “Notting Hill” and “Crazy Rich Asians,” the best movies about the highs and lows of finding The One can bring smiles to our faces and tears to our eyes. Arguably, it’s these films that make the most compelling arguments for a holiday wholly dedicated to flowers, greeting cards, and other displays of chocolate-dipped devotion.
Still, Valentine’s Day draws ire for its materialistic center and vaguely exclusionary culture. More than ever, singles, couples, and so-called “situationships” are foregoing the traditional dinner-for-two and enjoying Galentine’s, Palentine’s, and other counter culture celebrations on or around February 14. Whether you’re honoring the platonic relationships in your life, or giving a pointed middle finger to the largely heteronormative holiday, horror movies can provide a great outlet for your anti-Valentine’s feels.
Featuring a human heart in a box of chocolates, George Mihalka’s “My Bloody Valentine” is a 1981 Canadian slasher set in a troubled mining town. It’s the most iconic scary movie set on February 14, but at number three doesn’t top our list of recommendations for what to stream this year. There’s a campy joy to seeing seasonally specific details in scary movies, yes. (See Hulu’s holiday-themed “Into the Dark” horror TV anthology, and its three Valentine’s Day specials: “Down,” “My Valentine, and “Tentacles.”) But you have more options of better quality when you considering cuing up more generally terrifying tales about romance and revenge.
Cautionary tales of stranger danger, such as Anna Biller’s “The Love Witch” and Mimi Cave’s “Fresh,” are strong contenders for a group of singles griping about the dating scene. Alternatively, people who are partnered up might find sick fun in watching Ari Aster’s notorious breakup movie “Midsommar” or Yorgos Lanthimos’ absurdist tragedy “The Lobster.” And for the offbeat romantic, there’s always Guillermo del Toro’s Best Picture winner: “The Shape of Water.”
Listed in order of our preference, here are 14 horror movies to leave you heartsick this Valentine’s Day.
-
14. “Cat People” (1942)
Image Credit: Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: Jacques Tourneur’s prolific 1942 creature suspense film follows a woman named Irena (Simone Simon) who believes she is descended from an ancient race of feline-human hybrids able to transform into panthers. The ability, she fears, is linked to the carnal pleasure of sex. Although Irena’s burning sensuality isn’t presented as a positive per se, “Cat People” changed the genre’s feminist game with its serious consideration of women’s sexual autonomy and wants. Irena’s arc isn’t exactly lovey-dovey: instead offering an erotic artifact of womanhood’s evolving portrayal in pop culture and a timelessly suspenseful consideration of reluctant lust. —AF
Perfect for: Cinephiles who appreciate an understated classic.
-
13. “Audition” (1999)
Image Credit: ©Vitagraph Films LLC/Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: Takashi Miike’s brutal magnum opus is an eternal reminder to always read the fine print. When a widower makes the extremely normal decision to find his second wife through an audition process resembling a Hollywood casting, he settles on a beautiful woman whose only flaw appears to be a tendency to occasionally lie on her resume. But he soon realizes that he bit off more than he can chew, and a disagreement about the semantics of his promise to love her and her alone results in one of the greatest torture sequences in cinematic history. —CZ
Perfect for: Anyone who’s sick of swiping through dating apps and thinks there simply has to be a better way to meet people.
-
12. “Bride of Frankenstein” (1935)
Image Credit: Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: While Dr. Frankenstein’s decision to play God and make a man from scratch was admittedly not humanity’s finest hour, the idea to build the monster a friend was (theoretically) a nice touch. Despite realizing the error of his ways after the debacle that was the first film, Frankenstein is persuaded to go back to his old ways by his twisted mentor Dr. Septimus Pretorius (an all-time great villain name if their ever was one). When he decides to craft a mate for his monster, Frankenstein thinks he’s making an Eve for his Adam — but per usual, he just introduces indescribable manmade horrors into the universe. While the monsters never quite get the honeymoon phase they probably deserved “The Bride of Frankenstein” remains a high point in the Universal monster movie catalogue. —CZ
Perfect for: Recent divorcees who want an excuse to make monster puns about their former spouse.
-
11. “The Lobster” (2015)
Image Credit: Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: An oddly moving story that lures you in with a ridiculous premise before gradually turning you into an emotional wreck somewhere along the way. In other words, it’s a Yorgos Lanthimos movie. Colin Farrell stars as a lonely man who, in accordance with the laws of his dystopian city, is sent to a resort for single people where he’s given 45 days to find a new lover. It’s a bit like “Bachelor in Paradise,” except that those who remain unpartnered at the end of the excursion are turned into an animal — in Farrell’s case, a lobster. What could have been abysmal (seriously, read that logline again) in the hands of virtually anyone else ends up being a poignant exploration of the sometimes needlessly complex social norms that humans impose on themselves. It’s a middle finger to authoritarianism and a reminder that imposing rules on something as fluid and fragile as love is the ultimate fool’s errand. —CZ
Perfect for: Anyone who’s stressing about finding The One before their window closes. [Editor’s Note: Amazing news: the window isn’t real!]
-
10. “It Follows” (2014)
Image Credit: ©Weinstein Company/Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: Writer/director David Robert Mitchell’s brilliant if brutal feature-length chase sequence starring Maika Monroe as a teenager haunted by a shapeshifting entity. At first blush, the 2014 supernatural nightmare might seems silly: chronicling one cycle of a curse passed on to new victims much like an STD. (Want to escape the ever-evolving monster pursuing you around the clock? Give it to a stranger through sex!) But following a truly terrifying date-and-switch, final girl Jay must decide what to do with the burden cruelly bestowed on her by a bad crush in an endurance test as unnerving for her as it is for the audience. —AF
Perfect for: Horror fans who aren’t going anywhere for Valentine’s Day. (Seriously, you don’t even want to walk the dog after this one.)
-
9. “Bones and All” (2022)
Image Credit: ©MGM/Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: Luca Guadagnino and Timothee Chalamet got most of the “Call Me By Your Name” band back together to tell the ultimate cannibal love story. Taylor Russell is a perfect romantic foil for Chalamet in this story of a boy who falls for a girl who likes to eat people during a trip through the American heartland. Boosted by an appropriately sparse score from Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross, “Bones and All” is the rare movie that manages to be genuinely romantic and nauseating in equal measures. —CZ
Perfect for: “Call Me By Your Name” fans who thought the peach scene wasn’t nearly kinky enough.
-
8. “Midsommar” (2019)
Image Credit: Everett Collection / Everett Collection What it is: Ari Aster followed up “Hereditary,” one of the best horror debuts of the century (if not all time), with this folk horror masterpiece about a relationship that just can’t be saved. Florence Pugh gives a star-making turn as a woman who doesn’t realize she’s about to get dumped when her boyfriend reluctantly invites her to attend a Swedish midsummer festival hosted by a cult that’s far more sinister than meets the eye. Which is really saying something, because what meets the eye looks pretty bad too! Aster skillfully leads us through the depths of this hellish festival, and the juxtaposition between pagan celebrations and unbridled evil resulted in some of the best horror imagery produced in years. —CZ
Perfect for: Anyone who thought they could wait out the Thanksgiving-Christmas-New Year’s-Valentine’s Day minefield before ending a bad relationship. Sometimes, you just have to burn it down.
-
7. “Misery” (1990)
Image Credit: ©Columbia Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: Among the best Stephen King adaptations to date, Rob Reiner’s “Misery” is a teeth-gnashing tale of literary obsession. Kathy Bates kills as the hot-tempered Annie Wilkes: a neurotic fan of romance novels whose favorite author Paul Sheldon, played by a sympathetic but still steely James Caan, metaphorically stumbles onto her doorstep following a snowy car crash. “Misery” won Bates the statuette for Best Actress at the 63rd Academy Awards: a performance still widely regarded among the most notorious villains in film history. —AF
Perfect for: Stephen King fans who aren’t too sensitive about the safety of their ankles.
-
6. “The Love Witch” (2016)
Image Credit: Everett Collection / Everett Collection What it is: Writer/director Anna Biller’s transporting tale of a lovesick sorceress intent on finding the one. Samantha Robinson stars as Elaine Parks: a stunning and mysterious stranger who moves into a SoCal town only to have the men she fancies disappear soon after meeting her. The heavily stylized horror comedy is regularly confused for an original work of the ’60s and ’70s: complete with an illustrated poster too many scroll past on streaming services. A sapphic fantasy infused with feminist whimsy and just enough sinister satire, “The Love Witch” offers both an enchanting homage to period films and a silly sendup of modern dating. —AF
Perfect for: Enemies of the patriarchy.
-
5. “Fresh” (2022)
Image Credit: ©Searchlight Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: Sebastian Stan picks rom-com charm from his perfectly white teeth in Mimi Cave’s deliciously funny “Fresh,” a dating horror story starring Daisy Edgar-Jones as a Portland woman abducted and kept alive as she’s sold piecemeal on the cannibalism market. The “Normal People” actress reveals Lauryn Kahn’s spunky metaphor for modern dating with crystal clarity at times, as her first bloody encounter with Stan’s eater of women is a plain, petrifying catfish account. But when our heroine literally gets off her ass, Edgar-Jones doggedly coughs up a chunky characterization of singles, strangers, and the menace of men that’s at once nauseating and a little bit naughty. —AF
Perfect for: Blind dates looking to test their connection right away.
-
4. “Let the Right One In” (2008)
Image Credit: ©Magnolia Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: Equal parts gothic romance and coming-of-age story Tomas Alfredson’s vampire saga about the friendship between a pre-teen boy and a vampire girl next door is a singular cinematic achievement. Few films rival its ability to incorporate horror elements into a genuinely believable human story, as Alfredson masterfully uses dramatic irony and subtext to illustrate the darkness that lurks just outside of childhood. Vampire romances are a dime a dozen, but if you only watch one during your time on this Earth, please make it this one. —CZ
Perfect for: Former “Twilight” fans who are ready to level up.
-
3. “My Bloody Valentine” (1981)
Image Credit: ©Paramount/Courtesy Everett Collection What it is: Ranking among Quentin Tarantino’s favorite slasher films, director George Mihalka’s “My Bloody Valentine” tells the terrifying tale of hard-partying young people in a mining town who are ruthlessly stalked by a pickax-wielding murderer on — you guessed it — Valentine’s Day. The oozing, dimly-lit slasher stems from an unprecedentedly nightmarish workplace accident years before this story, which is pitch-perfect for the sometimes melodramatic subgenre or overly contrived depending on your tastes. Regardless, there’s no denying the vision behind this wildly confident killing spree. “My Bloody Valentine” was originally lambasted for its guts and gore, but has since become a celebrated staple of ’80s slasher cinema. —AF
Perfect for: “Friday the 13th” and “Halloween” fans looking for another seasonal special.
-
2. “The Shape of Water” (2017)
Image Credit: Fox Searchlight / Everett Collection What it is: A fantasy romance about the love that forms between a mute janitor at a government lab and a research subject that everyone would have her believe is a monster. And the skeleton key to interpreting Guillermo del Toro’s entire filmography. In many ways, the first three decades of del Toro’s career can be distilled to a single idea: in a world that divides itself into good guys and monsters, the real evil often lies in the person pointing their finger at the creatures. It’s a theme that appears again and again in his films, but “The Shape of Water” stands out as the definitive illustration of his worldview. Pulling from an eclectic group of influences that includes black-and-white Universal monster movies, Cold War sci-fi serials, and lush Old Hollywood romances, del Toro merges the lowbrow with the highbrow to craft a love story that feels far more human than plenty of films that don’t feature an aquatic creature as the male lead. —CZ
Perfect for: Anyone whose true love is the magic of the movies and prefers their Valentine’s Days with a little cinematic pizazz.
-
1. “Mandy” (2018)
Image Credit: Everett Collection / Everett Collection What it is: Surprise 2023 Best Actress nominee Andrea Riseborough has spent her fair share of time in the horror genre, leading Brandon Cronenberg’s “Possessor” and serving as the magnetic catalyst for Panos Cosmatos’ extraordinarily romantic “Mandy.” The supersaturated revenge saga premiered at Sundance in 2018, and shreds in every sense of the word. It’s scored by the late Jóhann Jóhannsson, whose singular blend of metal and electronic music propels the hyper-violent vengeance of Red Miller: a devastated widower hunting the people responsible for murdering his wife and destroying their once serene woodland home. Co-written by Cosmatos and Aaron Stewart-Ahn, “Mandy” has a plot but is more of a vibes-first type of watch: akin to a feature-length music video as trippy as it is tragic. Linus Roache will make your skin crawl as the main villain: a wicked cult leader caught somewhere between Earth’s outer atmosphere and the gates of Hell. But Cage will break your heart ten times over with his agonizing but still unequivocally badass action performance. —AF
Perfect for: Fans of epic chainsaw battles and/or Nicolas Cage.
Sign Up: Stay on top of the latest breaking film and TV news! Sign up for our Email Newsletters here.